A few weeks ago I felt a shift happening for me. A new process. I’ve read much, heard much and written much yet, the past few weeks all of it was being questioned. Do you really believe that? Again and again this was now the question. And I can’t tell you how many times I found myself saying, I don’t. Wait… seriously… because I was actually saying that to some of my own core beliefs, ways and foundation. The very foundation Spirit had helped me build – a process in itself.
Seriously… it took a while to remove the old foundation and build a new one so why are we testing it now? Actually… removing some again. I can and do understand why some would say, no and cling to their current foundation.
At first I thought it was a growing pains moment. For me growing pains come on out of the blue every now and then (yet usually towards the end of the day). One can get whiney, uncertain and proclaim you are over it while at the same time know you’ll be fine after a good night’s sleep – you’re not to be taken too serious. It’s just you’ve been stretched a bit and it all needs to settle/catch up.
Yet, these moments have continued over the past few weeks (minus the whining or proclaiming – yah!). I’ve been redefining what spirituality means to me. Really, we do this each and every day yet this seemed more pronounced. It makes, truth, seem temporary. Ever changing.
What I discovered was I actually don’t need a foundation. It feels like walking on water – very fluid. I now understand I couldn’t have done this before. I’m not a good swimmer yet I’ve learned to face my fear and go deep. I now have faith and trust.
Walking on water, in the clouds or on the earth… really is there any difference?